God’s sport

On this weekend of semi finals (stupid Hawthorn), I’ve heard a number of sporting clichés being tossed around. One class of descriptors that I’ve always found interesting is the “soccer is the beautiful game” or “racing/boxing is the sport of kings” (which leads me to believe that horse fighting is the sport of… what’s better than a king, an emperor?). The one I’ve always seen as incongruous, however, is the idea of rugby as “god’s sport” that I’ve heard bandied around from time to time. Now, I’m no theologian (in fact I’m pretty far from it) but the idea of  a divine sport being one where burly brick-headed men wrestle in the mud whilst trying to avoid being fingered is an interesting comment by itself on the religious landscape.

I was discussing this a while back with my housemate, and we hit upon a better candidate.

God’s sport is korfball.

No, seriously.

For those who’ve never heard of korfball, it’s a Dutch invented sport that’s kind of like a cross between netball and soccer, and can be played indoor or outdoors.

It’s place as god’s sport is obvious, just look at the similarities:

  • It’s played with mixed-gender teams, just like real life
  • It has weird rules that no-one understands, but those who play go along with it.
  • You score points for good sportsmanship
  • People play it, and that’s fine, but anyone who’s super hardcore about it is rightly considered to be weird
  • Ultimately the rest of the sporting universe ignores it
  • It should in no way be used to influence public policy, and
  • I don’t particularly want to play korfball.

Korfball. God’s sport.

Silliness, Uncategorized

Everything -punk

I’ve decided, and I say this as a steampunker and dieselpunker, that I’m sick of things being whatever-punk. I get it, it’s a convenient genre thing, but we’ve seen in the past few years cyberpunk (still the best -punk) steampunk (airships, League of Extraordinary Gentlemen), dieselpunk (Grimy goggles and World Wars, Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow), biopunk (if it bleeds, kill it), cattlepunk, Atompunk, and, according to TV Tropes: iPunk, Desert Punk and Dungeonpunk, to name a few.

The general idea is that it shares a “look! It’s technology but weird” and a dystopian/antiauthoritarian themes- it doesn’t mean that you’ve stuck a bunch of bloody cogs on glasses. The best anything -punk takes an era (whether it’s the past or the future), freezes the social situation and turns the nasty knobs up full

It’s as bad as appending -gate to any remotely dicey political thing: by doing so, you dilute the original meaning/genre.

So with that in mind, here’s two more:

Punkpunk: In 1980s England, the Thatcher era has gone on forever. Social divisions, driven by racially motivated violence, the shutdown of British manufacturing and the increasing divide between rich and poor, have given rise to powerful factions like the Front Defence League, a far-right white power group that has seized control of the police forces, and the rebellious Makers, disposessed workers with incredible technical skills and a commitment to collectivism at any cost. This social environment has seen the development of a new counter-culture, that breaks free of the social strictures of the time. This movement, led by luminaries such as the mysterious Strummer and the animalistic Sid (secretly a clone created by a corporation), fight against the structures of power whilst shredding and smashing instruments.

Also, Margaret Thatcher is secretly a robot.

Gatepunk: In the far future, Humanity has spread among the stars. With planetary systems linked by giant warp gates, whichever megacorporation controls the flow through the gates controls the universe. What previously would have been sorted out in the courts by these companies is now settled through intergalactic warfare (thanks to the American Citizens United decision) which further suppresses the freedom and social mobility of the settlers of these far planets. A group of rag-tag misfits on the planet Tyson discover that the gates can be liberated only through overthrowing the powerful Apple nation.
Also, Steve Jobs was secretly a robot.


First Movement, E Minor

I have decided to start a blog, to sharpen some of my writing skills and for general fun- I aim to use this when I go to South America next year, and WordPress just seems classier.
Do I expect readers? No, so see this as a total vanity project. I’m going to aim for at least one post a week, and do a mixture of talking about videogames, nerderies, and other stuff.